An old boyfriend nicknamed our blogging heroine “The Zadge,” claiming that she was a total exaggerator and prone to dramatics for the sake of humor. What?!!! The Zadge rhymes with Madge. But the Zadge does not look like Madge, either the one in the 1970′s Palmolive commercials or the freaky plastic surgery Madonna one.
The Zadge’s Top Secret Day Job requires a blogging pseudonym. And a graduate degree.
The Zadge ditched her workaholic, stressed-out life in the Nation’s Capitol when she was 43 years old for a new life out West. She now happily resides in Denver in “Old Vicky,” her 1896 Queen Anne Victorian. She’s single, but hoping to find her cowboy. In the meantime, she pretends that she’s dating Daniel Craig. And cheating on him with Denzel Washington. She is also hopelessly obsessed with Keith Richards.
She cooks, she entertains, she travels, she works out. She’s learning to strum on her blue acoustic guitar. She recommends ear plugs. She buys old houses and lives through hell while she renovates them. And she naps a lot. You can usually find her with a camera or a cocktail in her hand. Sometimes both, so blame any blurry shots on that.
She hates Twitter, salmon, February, Sarah Palin, cheap people, skinny jeans, long toenails, saying goodbye, and that dogs don’t live longer.
She loves dark chocolate with caramel and sea salt, her Nikon d700 camera, Friday Night Lights, NFL football on Sundays, getting her heart rate over 130, the weather in Denver, a deep couch covered with books and dogs in front of a fire, Saturday mornings, and, of course, her boyfriends Daniel Craig and Keef.
She also loves her peeps. Meet her cast of characters. First, there are her critters:
The leading role was played by Jackson a.k.a. “The Shone”, who passed away on January 22, 2011, after squeezing every ounce of joy out of life. He was the Zadge’s 13-year old baby, best friend, constant companion, and love of her life. He’s now the angel that follows the Zadge around and protects her. In his honor, the Zadge got her first (and only) tattoo on Memorial Day 2011 of his angel wings on her right hip.
The understudy is the young scamp, Harry. He’s five now and finally starting to behave. He did a stint in prison and shared a cell with a murderer. Seriously. You can search back in the archives and see the havoc he has wreaked on the Zadge’s life, if you have hours and hours to spare.
And there is sweet, shy Tulip the Cat, 13 years young. She tends to get overshadowed by her yellow brothers. But every once in a while, she’ll roll around in a big bouquet of fresh catnip and then, look out! Her paws are white. She thinks you can wear white shoes after Labor Day.
The newest addition to the Zadge’s posse is Bugs. The Zadge bailed him out of jail. Literally. He was found wandering in the middle of Nebraska and the Colorado Women’s Prison K9 Training Program took him in and trained his sweet self. He is about three and is the sweetest, zen-like dog of the bunch. His name is short for Cuddlebugs/Lovebugs ’cause that’s what he is.
Then there is the Fin Fan Club. He’s the Zadge’s two-year old, blonde, curly-topped nephew. His mother, the Zadge’s “Sista,” is only 13 months younger than she and they are thick as thieves, even if they are separated by 2000 miles. And “Moomskers” is the loving mom/grandma to us all. Visits to and from the Fin Fan Club are the highlights of the Zadge’s year.
Plus, you’ll hear about the Zadge’s posse of friends, and her, to date, not so successful dating foibles. She’s starting to think she should just marry Daniel Craig and settle down.