The Zadge had a fun weekend.
She spent Friday morning with Darth Vadar and his light saber, getting the age spots on her face burned off. She’s sure her dermatologist won’t mind her referring to him as the Dark Lord. This was a relatively inexpensive light saber, with no downtime or bruising or oozing or swelling. The Zadge was back at the Top Secret Day Job an hour later, looking no worse for wear.
But while she was in Darth’s office, she decided to go bold and schedule an appointment in a few months to actually have the Dark Lord use his light saber to laser off all of her
face wrinkles. In technical Star Wars lingo, it’s called a ProFractional Laser and the results are pretty spectacular. Apparently, the Zadge’s skin will look like a baby’s butt, without the diaper rash.
Except that to get to the baby butt skin, the Zadge is going to have to bleed and ooze and swell and look like this for almost a week:Well, hopefully Darth won’t turn her into a man. And natural beauty doesn’t come cheap or pain free, my friends.
On Saturday night, the Zadge ate, drank and danced to a band to celebrate the birth of her newest BFF, Penne from Little Girl Big Glasses. Well, it’s not like Penne was just pushed out of her mother’s va-jay-jay that Saturday. Because boozing and dancing it up in front of a rock-a-billy band until one o’clock in the morning with a newborn would be weird, wouldn’t it?
So the Zadge doesn’t have any good photos of the party festivities, which included fine dining, and not so fine drinking, and laughing, and more low-brow drinking, and dancing with a cute guy to Neil Diamond’s “Sweet Caroline” at 1 a.m. performed by a country-rock band. But she does have this photo of Penne’s dear hubby and how proud he is of his 24-ounce can of Pabst Blue Ribbon:
Then Sunday rolled around and how did our Irish Lass celebrate St. Patrick’s Day?
And this would be where the “caulk” jokes start. Lay ‘em down.