Random Ruminations
- There is nothing anyone can say that will convince the Zadge that these should ever grace her feet:
And she cringes every time she sees some fool-guy in the gym wearing them.
- Now this is something only Hulk, Babe the Builder and Moomskers will understand, but the Zadge loves Sunday Soundtracks during Monday Night Football’s halftime show.
- But lest you think our girl is all sports all the time, know that she is actually a Makeup Girl. She loves makeup, but hates to look made up. Which is why she loves the newest “It” thing in the cosmetics industry, Giorgio Armani’s Maestro Fusion Foundation:
It’s some sort of scientific breakthrough formula that deposits the pigment on your skin and everything else evaporates. So it literally feels like you have nothing on your skin, but provides a glowy, medium coverage. And let’s face it – over the age of 40 – anything heavier makes you look like an old lady. It’s expensive, but my peeps, natural beauty doesn’t come cheap or pain free.
- And Hulk leaves the room.
- The Zadge is loving the latest addition to her art collection:
The Zadge picked up this painting of the Mexican coast from a local yard sale as she was walking the hounds. For a whopping ten dollars. All she did was gild the plain wood frame and then hung it in her dining room. Who needs snooty New York City art galleries?
- And speaking of the hounds and new additions, how totally in love is the Zadge with her sweet Bugs?
He is calm, and cuddly, and soulful.
- Unless he sees a squirrel, and oh, Baby Jesus of Bethlehem, look out.
- And apparently, he is picking up a few bad habits from his older, insane brother. Sunday afternoon, while the Zadge cooked up a big pot of White Chicken Chili, Bugs inexplicably walked into the middle of the kitchen and took a big dump. Right in front of her. The Zadge believes she could run her own Dogshaming.com site just with her dogs alone.
- The Zadge just got home from her Match.com date with the Cancelling/Reappearing Swimmer. She was expecting a 44-year old version of this:
You know, dumb, but in great shape. Which she was alright with for a, ahem, limited purpose, wink, wink.
- Instead, the Swimmer was smart and pudgy. Like, really pudgy for a former National Championship Team swimmer. But smart. And pudgy. And head-over-heels for the Zadge. Like, in the over-complimentary way that made the Zadge feel like the date was a little lopsided. So the Zadge is a little unsure what to make of the date. The Un-Lochte is out of town for the next 10 days, so she doesn’t have to worry about it for awhile. And based on the amount of holiday candy the Zadge has been eating at the Top Secret Day Job, she’ll probably be pudgy too by then anyway.
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I can’t believe someone was selling that painting for 5 bucks! Good eye! You know the phrase “over-complimentary” is making us both cringe, and not in a good way. It just means you have to get really drunk to consider even a kiss.
Several guys in my office wear the shoes in #1 – to work- and I can guarandamntee you none are the least bit athletic…sorta like your non-Lochte…
Bugs! What was that all about? Was he giving his commentary on your latest date, the Un-Lochte?
Pudgy is difficult.
Surely it wouldn’t take too much to svelte him…..he does love swimming.
If the prize is you…..he may think it would be worth it.
But if he isn’t a person
you are interested in…….don’t bother.
Speaking as someone on the pudgy side.
Date???? ‘da FUCK?
And what is wrong with smart and pudgy???
Good thing you like sports…
Hulk, he was no Hulk. Hence, the 90 minute date.
Love the painting, mi amigo!